Letter To My Son

Dear Dex,

We came to visit you and Mercy today. Did you see the garden we planted? We were so happy to find the lithodora flowers. They seemed so perfect for you. We haven’t been very good gardeners in the past, but these are very special flowers to honor your role in our family, so we’ll take extra special care of them.

It’s been more than 6 months now and so much has happened. Some days I still just can’t believe that you are really gone. It’s not at all how we planned things, but we know that Heavenly Father loves us and that this is part of His plan.

I am so proud of you. I remember the power of your spirit on the day we said goodbye, and I am so thankful for the times that you have come to visit since then. I look forward to the day when I can hold you in my arms again and never have to let you go. You are a brave and noble son and I am humbled to be your mother.

Please keep pulling for us. Your efforts really do make a difference. Thank you for coming to Crew’s NICU blessing. Thank you for being with Crew so often and for lending him your strength. You two are so different in spirit and personality, but I see so much of you in his beautiful face.

We are trying to make the right choices so that we can be with you again. Your life and your death has been a unifying force for the entire extended family. You have strengthened my testimony of the plan of salvation and you have been an inspiration to anyone who hears about you.

I love you and miss you all the time but we are ok and we are finding joy in the journey.

Love,
Mommy


After spending time writing letters and making cards for Dex and Mercy, we spent some time at the cemetery as a family this afternoon. Boy, there were a lot of people and flowers there! The cemetery is a hoppin' place on Memorial Day weekend!

We knew that we couldn't place a stone until spring, but we didn't realize how long it would take to finish once we ordered it, so we are still waiting. We definitely should have put things in motion during the winter. Live and learn. We were disappointed to not have it ready for today. It seemed lacking.

Tanner suggested we requisition a rocket ship to take us to heaven for a visit. Do you think we can find a good deal on Orbitz? I just love my kids.